Picture it. It's early morning and I've just spent the past half hour trying to drink a cup of hot tea without wearing it. Bella, our 6 month old Golden Retriever, has more energy at 6am than my nerves can handle. She's determined to get on my lap, and help drink my tea, whether I like it or not. Follow this with her attempting to drag me across the icy backyard to bark at her nemesis Oliver (the neighbour's Labradoodle, who by the way isn't even outside) and my blood pressure is getting up there.
Yes, I know I need to use my calm, assertive energy with her at this point. I have all the Cesar Millan books and most of the time I do well channelling the Dog Whisperer. I even attempted watching recorded episodes in the morning to practice staying calm with Bella. Guess how that worked out? Bella likes to watch with me (very cute) and then bark at Caesar and his dogs (not even a little cute).
However...knowing what you should be doing and actually having the patience to do it are sometimes two different things, especially when someone won't let you drink your damned tea. What should come out as a firm "tssst" sound to correct Bella actually comes out sounding more like a snarled "ssssssstop itttttt!" followed by a rather childish "ugggghhh, Bella!" Anyone who has tried to handle a puppy's energy not matching your own should know what I'm talking about here.
Add to this a ringing phone, a kid who keeps telling you she doesn't want to go to school but you know really should, lunches to make when you forgot to get groceries (again), the moody cat sitting by her empty bowl glaring at you, dishes in the sink that still haven't washed themselves and by the way, a realtor coming over in a few hours to talk about the house that's not ready.
And that's when I lost it. As in head-spinning, ears-ringing, get-me-outta here kinda lost it. Those around me could sense the shift in atmosphere and took cover. I had the kids dropped off at school, puppy in the crate and cat in hiding within minutes.
Then I did what any good overwhelmed mother does. I grabbed a piece of chocolate and locked myself in the bathroom. No one can find me there, right? I found a quiet place to catch my breath and re-group. When I finally emerged, slightly calmer but still frazzled, Chris (my hubby) smiled sweetly (and also fearfully) and said "Hun, remember you started a blog....the whole fresh start thing...new approach to life and all that?" Damnit. I hate it when he's right.
So it's been a few hours since then and I've remembered that whole blog thing. The realtor came and went, and you know what? I survived. Yes, he did comment "wow, you still have a lot of work to do, eh?" several times, but ok. So does my father-in-law. And as Chris said, we'll just prove 'em wrong.
